A club meeting gives you something to put on the calendar. A picnic gives you a reason to spend an afternoon together. A class gives you something to ask about next week.
These plans can seem small beside the ambition of making friends or finding community. But they give that ambition a time and a place. It is hard to build a social life around an intention that never becomes an appointment.
What the survey found
A September 29 analysis by Data for Progress compares a survey of 1,098 U.S. adults in 2026 with DDB Needham survey results from 1995. The share reporting each activity at least once in the previous 12 months fell:
- Entertaining at home: 88 percent to 67 percent.
- Going on a picnic: 58 percent to 39 percent.
- Attending a club meeting: 45 percent to 26 percent.
- Attending a place of worship: 74 percent to 54 percent.
The pattern was not universal: exercise classes and pop or rock concerts saw increases.
The surveys used different sampling, response modes, and weighting. Data for Progress describes the comparison as suggestive of trends, not a precise estimate of change. These figures measure annual participation, not hours together, friendship quality, or why behavior changed.
Give friendship another occasion
The earlier essay on dinner parties looks at invitations between friends. This wider pattern raises another question: where can someone go to begin building those connections?
A concert can be a wonderful night out. A picnic can bring old friends together. A recurring group offers a particular possibility: another occasion to see someone without having to invent a new plan from scratch.
Separate research offers some support for making room for shared time. In two studies of friendship formation, communication researcher Jeffrey Hall found that more time together was associated with closer friendships. Among first-year students followed over nine weeks, time together also predicted later increases in closeness. That is an association, not a promise that attending a certain number of sessions will produce a friend.
The practical suggestion is to leave room for a next meeting. Choose a gathering you would want to return to, even if the first visit is mostly about figuring out where to stand.
Make gatherings easier to join
A listing can say everyone is welcome and still leave a newcomer with practical questions. Is a partner required? Does the price include equipment? Which entrance is open? Who should someone speak to when they arrive?
If you organize a gathering, try reading the invitation as someone who has never been there. Include the total cost, access details, registration steps, and what happens at the start. Explain whether someone can come alone. Give people a way to ask about needs the listing does not cover.
Then think about the arrival itself. A named person to look for can help. So can a brief explanation of how the activity works and an introduction to another participant. These are small things a host can arrange before anyone walks through the door.
Regulars can help too. Introduce yourself, make room at the table, or explain the part of the session that everyone else seems to understand already. Mention the next meeting so a newcomer knows there is an invitation to return.
For someone considering a first visit, those details are useful things to look for or ask about. Choose a session that fits your budget, schedule, and access needs. If arriving alone is the difficult part, the guide to going to an event alone walks through the first few minutes.
Make room for participation
Individual effort has limits. A clearer invitation cannot create spare income, accessible transport, or time away from care responsibilities. Any serious conversation about participation needs room for those constraints, alongside encouragement to show up.
Hey Sammy focuses on a practical part of that work: helping people find local activities and understand how to participate. A useful recommendation should help you reach an actual gathering, with enough information to take the first step.
Choose one plan that fits your life. Give it a date, find out how to join, and see how the first visit feels. A social life needs somewhere to happen. One workable gathering is a place to start.
Sources
- Lew Blank, Americans’ Social Activity Has Steeply Declined in the Past 30 Years, Data for Progress, September 29, 2026. Survey questions, results, and methodology.
- Jeffrey A. Hall, How many hours does it take to make a friend?, Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, first published online March 15, 2018.